


The Usual Objections (It's Sentimental, I Know)

by Willowe



Series: Romance is Boring [7]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Aromantic Tony Stark, Christmas Party, Communication Failure, F/F, F/M, Family Drama, Fluff, Holidays, M/M, Multi, Relationship Negotiation, Sobriety, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2017-12-28
Packaged: 2019-02-23 02:58:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13180938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Willowe/pseuds/Willowe
Summary: It's the annual AvengersSecret Santa"Non-Denominational Gift-Giving Exchange" and Pepper and Rhodey are nowhere to be found. Tony goes looking for them, and has to smooth some ruffled feathers when it turns out that his partners have gotten into a fight about family and privacy.





	The Usual Objections (It's Sentimental, I Know)

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "White Wine in the Sun" by Tim Minchin (which is probably my favorite Christmas song of all time).
> 
> Happy holidays to all who celebrated something this month, and a very happy New Year to you all as well!

Bruce’s Santa hat is slipping down his head, partially covering one eye and setting his glasses askew. He squints a little as he tries to read the name written on the gift that he’s holding, and finally calls out, “For Nat. From Tony. Careful, it’s a little weighty.”

“I thought the point of the Secret Santa was that you don’t know who the gift is from,” Sam says as the gift is passed over to Natasha. 

“It’s not a Secret Santa-” Steve begins.

“Non-denominational gift-giving exchange, sure, whatever,” Sam says, waving one hand dismissively. “It’s a Secret Santa, and the name is the most transparent attempt at inclusivity I’ve ever seen.”

“We’ll be sure to change that for next year,” Steve says, and Tony has no doubt that Captain America fully intends on following through with that promise. 

“Awesome. My point is, though, why is Tony labeling his gifts and why are there _gifts_ , plural, from him given the rules of this gift exchange?” Sam asks.

“Tony’s a billionaire. He’s exempt from the rules,” Natasha says. She's unwrapping the present delicately, peeling the paper back slowly as if testing herself to see if she can get it off in one piece. 

“By which she means, he gives gifts to everyone,” Bruce adds.

“Hey, now,” Tony protests mildly. “I have an actual gift in there for the pick-a-name-out-of-a-hat exchange too.”

“Yeah, but did you sign your name on that one as well?” Clint asks with a grin.

Tony thinks about that for a moment, then shrugs. “I don’t remember.”

The group laughs and Tony grins, not bothered by them taking their amusement at his expense. Everyone is relaxed, content in that lazy, satisfied way that the team rarely gets to experience with their lives the way they are. Tony would bet on most of them being slightly drunk too, or at least on their way there. Even Steve is looking a little pink around his face- in thanks, no doubt, to the Asgardian mead that he’s been sharing with Thor all evening. It’s endearing, bordering on adorable, how they think that he hasn’t noticed them sneaking shots of liquor into their appropriately-festive drinks, but he appreciates their efforts to be subtle around him nonetheless. 

Tony might actually be the only one still entirely sober (back to a week without a drink, after his last streak predictably ended on the 16th) and he finds that he’s not actually annoyed by that like he was expecting to be. He’s glad to see his teammates so relaxed, so at ease, enjoying each other’s company as they take turns opening gifts from the large pile underneath the TV. None of them are so big on any winter holiday that they felt the need to decorate, but somehow most of them have turned up in ugly Christmas sweaters or holiday-themed hats anyway, and there’s a video of a Yule log burning playing on loop on the TV.

Natasha has finally gotten the wrapping paper off with only a small tear in one corner that she still eyes with disdain as she pulls the paper away completely. “Well, I wasn’t expecting that,” she says as she unfolds the somewhat-lumpy blanket and spreads it out on top of her lap.

“Weighted blanket,” Tony explains. “Good for… weight.” 

Because he’s not announcing in front of the group that he sometimes encounters Natasha in the kitchen at odd hours of the night, Tony having not slept yet and Natasha unfortunately awake from a nightmare. Tony likes to think that he knows the assassin fairly well and, besides, he’s not an idiot; he knows that she’ll probably find the pressure of the blanket comforting on those nights, rather than suffocating. Tony would even bet money on her having already looked this up herself.

And, sure enough, Natasha eyes the blanket with a little more appreciation. “Interesting. Thank you.” 

Tony sits back in his chair, pleased with another successful gift, and takes a sip of non-alcoholic eggnog. This year there’s another gift for Nat from him, the one actually for the gift exchange where he did limit himself to the agreed-upon budget. The weighted blanket is Nat’s _second_ gift, because Tony has more money than he knows what to do with and there are worse things he could spend it on than gifts for his teammates. His one personal rule is that he doesn’t gift weapons for the holidays; he outfits the entire team, they don’t get anything related to work now. 

So far, Bruce has unwrapped a delicate tea-mixing set where all the components look like pieces of laboratory equipment. Steve has gotten a top-of-the-line artist’s tablet. Thor is always difficult to buy for, being an alien prince and all, but he’s nothing if not eager to learn about Midgard and Tony ultimately bought him a set of New York museum passes and a few encyclopedias about subjects that he’s shown a particular interest in. 

This year it was Sam who had been the hardest to shop for. Tony likes the guy, of course, because he's pretty sure that Sam is one of the most genuinely likeable people that Tony knows. But Tony hasn't spent much time with Sam, even though he's moved into the Tower; either Tony is out of town or Sam is off chasing a new lead on Bucky Barnes.

(The Find-a-Bucky Program had been Tony's Christmas gift to Steve last year. He's not sure that the art tablet can compare to that, but he knows that there was going to be no way he was ever going to top the program anyway.)

In the end it was Natasha that had tipped him off to Sam's love of baking, a skill he had learned from his mother. Sitting under the tree, still wrapped in the annoyingly festive paper that Tony had chosen this year, is a complete set of baking trays, cooling racks, mixers, bowls, and anything Sam's little baking heart could desire.

Clint, as always, had been the easiest to find a gift for, mostly because Clint had no qualms about vocally announcing what he wanted to be given. The new entertainment system had been installed in Clint's Brooklyn apartment earlier in the day, unbeknownst to the other man, and sitting under the tree was a Blu-Ray player with a note taped to the front that the rest of the gift was already in the next borough over.

Also waiting at Clint's apartment was a large bag of dog food for his ridiculous mutt, and a custom-made bow for Kate Bishop (because he doesn’t outfit the Young Avengers with gear, so giving _her_ a weapon doesn’t count as breaking his personal rule. Not in his opinion, anyway).

Bruce has already reached for another package- not one of Tony's, he can tell that already- and he frowns at it as he reads the name. “It says this one is for Colonel Rhodes,” he says. “I didn't know he was part of the gift exchange this year.”

“Well he's part of the team, isn't he?” Tony points out, though he understands Bruce's confusion. Ever since becoming War Machine and flying missions for the military it's been pretty hit-or-miss as to whether Rhodey would be around for the holidays or not and he doesn’t always have the time to exchange gifts with the rest of the Avengers. “He shipped me the gift for his recipient weeks ago and I put it out for him.”

“I thought Colonel Rhodes was here this year, though,” Steve says slowly. “I ran into him the other morning- unless he had to leave already?”

“No, he's still around here….” Tony says, although as he glances around at the assembled group he realizes for the first time that neither Rhodey nor Pepper have made it down to the party yet. “...somewhere- JARVIS, where the hell are Rhodey and Pepper? Did they get lost or something?”

“Colonel Rhodes and Ms. Potts have been…. momentarily delayed,” JARVIS says delicately. There are some snickers from the group assembled, because apparently the Earth’s Mightiest Heroes turn into a bunch of children with minds in the gutter when they’re drunk.

“Without me? For shame,” Tony says, because that’s the expected response to this situation and it makes his teammates laugh, but there’s something about how JARVIS said that, the exact cadence of his electronic voice, that makes Tony uneasy. Tony stands and says, “Give me a second, I’ll get them down here,” and quickly leaves the room.

Tony waits until he's safely in the hallway, out of earshot of everyone except possibly Steve or Thor, to ask JARVIS, "What happened?"

"Ms. Potts and Colonel Rhodes have had a disagreement," JARVIS says.

Tony sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. "Of course they did." It’s two days before Christmas, of _course_ something like this would happen. "Where are they?"

"In the penthouse, Sir."

"Then let's head upstairs."

Even as the elevator starts to rise, Tony knows that he shouldn’t be interfering in whatever is going on between Rhodey and Pepper. That’s not how they do things, and it usually doesn’t end well when one of them meddles where they shouldn’t. _But it’s Christmas_ , he tells himself, _or close enough to it anyway_. He’ll just pop in and make sure everything is okay. No harm in doing that.

Tony knocks on the penthouse door, just to be polite, but opens it before waiting for anyone to answer. Pepper and Rhodey are standing right in the foyer, Pepper with her hands on her hips and Rhodey with his arms crossed, both of them looking absolutely furious. "So, not to interrupt..." Tony begins.

"You are," Rhodey says.

"Rude," Tony says. "But there's a party going on downstairs and the team is starting to wonder where their favorite people are. Everything alright up here?"

"I don't know, why don't you ask Pepper?" Rhodey asks, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Oh please, I wasn't the one who threw a fit first!" Pepper snaps.

"I did not throw a fit!"

"You absolutely did!"

"Anyone want to fill me in?" Tony cuts in, before they can really get going.

Pepper and Rhodey glare at each other and, finally, Pepper says, "Rhodey told his family about the three of us _five years ago_ and didn't bother to mention this to anyone!"

Rhodey lets out a humorless bark of laughter. "Well Pepper _hasn't_ told her family about us, but she's told them about Holly _and_ she's meeting Holly's brother tomorrow!"

"Okay..." Tony says slowly. Obviously Rhodey and Pepper have different opinions about whether their family should know about their relationship. Tony just isn't sure why they're this riled up about it all. "And this is... a big deal?"

"Of course it is!" Pepper says, at the same time that Rhodey says, "Obviously, yeah!"

"Rhodey shouldn't have told his family without talking to us about it!" Pepper insists.

Rhodey snorts. "Please. Tony, you've met my mom, you know that there's no keeping secrets from her! She knew the first time I went home after we all got together."

"That doesn't give you the right to go five years without saying anything to us about it!" Pepper says.

"Well what about you? You've kept us a secret for five years, but you have no problem telling everyone that you're dating Holly after six months?" Rhodey snaps.

"Because my family wouldn't understand our relationship!"

"So it’s not worth trying to explain it anyway?"

"Woah, woah, okay, everyone back down for a second here," Tony says, because Pepper visible _recoils_ at that question and whatever she was going to say in response wasn't going to be good. "Rhodey, that was out of line."

Rhodey snorts. "Should've known you'd take her side."

Jesus christ, they really are worked up about this. "I'm not taking any sides," Tony says, deliberating keeping his voice calm even if he wants to smack Rhodey for that comment because, yeah, that stung a little. "Like you said, I know your family and I know how tenacious your mom can be. But don't imply that Pepper doesn't care just because she can't- or won't, the difference doesn't matter here- tell her family. 

“And Pepper-" Tony turns to her now, because he wasn't lying when he said he's not going to take sides, "-you can't tell me that you don't see how it's a little awkward that your family is gonna meet Holly before they meet the two of us, especially considering that you had already known us for years before we started this relationship."

Tony crosses his arms and looks between the both of them. They're both still angry, and not looking at each other, but at least it doesn't seem like they're going to tear each other's throats out now. "Maybe Rhodey should have told us that his family knew, and maybe Pepper should have told us that she wasn't planning on telling her family. But considering neither of you have apparently spoken about this before now, being this angry about it all seems a bit ridiculous if you ask me. If you had that strong of an opinion about it all, you should have said something before."

Now Rhodey and Pepper look a little sheepish, and a lot guilty. Pepper is the first one to break the silent standoff, with a sigh and saying, "I'm sorry, Jim. The only reason I haven't told them is because there's a lot of us Potts, a whole army practically, and they're all terrible gossips who can't keep a secret and don't let anything go. I didn't want this getting out beyond the family, and I didn't want my family to bother you two about it and make you uncomfortable."

Rhodey rubs the back of his neck, clearly embarrassed and feeling more than a bit awkward. "Aw, hell, Pep. I shouldn't have implied that you had to tell them, it just- it got under my skin, you know? My parents mean the world to me and my mom's too nosy for her own good. The only reason I explained things is because she thought I was just dating Tony- sorry, in a relationship with Tony-" Rhodey corrects quickly, "-and if she knew that much I wanted her to know about you too. For what it's worth, if I could take that back I would."

Pepper's lips quirk up in a small smile, the first Tony has seen since he came upstairs. "No, you wouldn't."

Rhodey chuckles a little at that. "No, I probably wouldn't. But... Pepper..."

"I know, I know," Pepper says with a sigh. "It's rotten of me to introduce Holly to my parents first. But Holly asked me if I wanted to meet their brother and he's the last family that's still speaking to them so I knew how important this was, and I just… didn’t think about it, I suppose. I am sorry about that, Jim, I really am."

"I'm not mad that Holly is meeting your family, but I... Fuck, I don't even know." Rhodey shakes his head. "I can get why you didn't tell your family, but I'm still upset, you know? Just like I bet you're still upset that my folks knew all this time- and I'm sorry about that myself."

"It's... Well, it _will_ be okay," Pepper says. "You can't take it back, so it'll just have to be okay. But maybe..." She bites her bottom lip, hesitant, "Maybe I can tell someone. Even things up a bit."

"I don't want you to feel like you have to tell your family, just because I got worked up about it all," Rhodey says firmly.

Pepper shakes her head. "No, no, it's- actually, it’s sort of like with your mom. I think this person already knows, or at least guesses, that I'm with Tony."

"I don't know how to feel about the fact that your families apparently just assume that I'm sleeping with you two," Tony pipes up, a wry smile on his face.

"It's not quite like that." Pepper's face is slowly turning bright red, not from anger this time but from embarrassment- and _that_ piques Tony's interest.

"Then what is it like?" Tony asks, curious.

“Do you remember when I told you that I thought you were aromantic?” Pepper asks Tony. He nods. “And I told you I had found the term by accident on Google? That… might not have been entirely true.”

Tony laughs. “Obviously. I had JARVIS go looking for other resources after I read through what you gave me, and the interesting thing was that none of _your_ sites came up in a standard search. I knew something was up, I just didn't know what it was." Although he thinks he has an idea of what happened now.

“That’s because I didn't actually find them on Google," Pepper says. "My sister sent them to me- my little sister, Sabrina. I had called her to- ah, well..." Pepper grimaces, and for a moment Tony thinks she isn't going to keep explain, but then she finally admits, "I had called her to complain about you being unreasonable with threatening to fire me, and Rina convinced me that you might have not been overreacting after all."

"No, no, I was definitely overreacting," Tony says. "Do not give me too much credit here, Pepper, that was definitely an overreaction."

"Well, she made me realize that it was at least understandable," Pepper says. "Also she told me to lie to you about how I felt so I could keep my job. Not sure if that's a point in her favor or not, but..." Pepper shrugs. "There you are."

"This story is, quite possibly, the best Christmas present you could have gotten me," Tony tells her, because he is absolutely delighted by it all. Rhodey too has a huge smile on his face, clearly as amused by the tale as Tony is. "I mean, I'm less thrilled that my attempts to make _"pulling a Pepper"_ a part of everyone's daily lexicon are now based around a factual error, but I'll get over that. Just when I thought the story of how I learned about aromantic identities couldn't get more ridiculous, you go and tell me this!"

"You're not mad then?"

"Mad? No, Pep, of course not!” Tony is quick to assure her. “The fact that that particular mess keeps turning out to be more like a soap opera every time you two get around to fessing up about things is _hilarious_!”

"I, however, would like to point out the hypocrisy of you keeping this a secret for five years and yet ragging on me for not telling you that my mom knew," Rhodey pipes up. Tony is tempted to smack him for nearly restarting the argument, but Rhodey is still grinning and when Pepper rolls her eyes it’s with a small smile on her own face, so Tony thinks they might still be okay. 

"Well, she doesn't know that we're together," Pepper says. "Just that I wasn’t opposed to that idea, back then. That, and the fact that Tony might be aro, but considering she hasn't spread that secret to anyone I think I can trust her with our relationship." Pepper shrugs. "I know it's not the same as telling my parents, but..."

"But it's enough," Rhodey interrupts, and Pepper smiles at him in relief. Rhodey steps towards her, but it's Pepper that gently grabs the front of his shirt and tugs him down into a kiss. Tony glances away, determined not to let his romance-repulsion ruin his partners' literal "kiss and make up" moment. 

Still, after several long moments, he clears his throat and says lightly, "Just remember, you two, you still need to make an appearance in downstairs and if you show up looking too dishevelled the team will not let you hear the end of it."

Rhodey laughs and pulls away, giving Pepper one last quick peck on the lips before saying, "Alright, let's head down then."

"We should still talk about this some more later," Pepper says, even as she reaches out and smoothes the creases out of the front of Rhodey's shirt. "Tony's right, we never did talk about our boundaries with privacy, and with Sam joining the team and now Holly in the picture more and more people are starting to find out about us. I don't want to hide it, but..."

"But we should know where each other stands," Rhodey finishes for her. He gently tucks a few strands of her hair behind her ear. Tony mentally applauds himself for not gagging at the sight. "I agree."

"Well, you two can have fun talking about that later then," Tony says. He opens the door and glances back over his shoulder, where both Pepper and Rhodey are now frowning at him, not having moved to follow. "What?"

"You should be part of that conversation too," Pepper says. "It's your relationship as well."

Tony shrugs. "It doesn't matter to me. I don't really have any stakes in family finding out, you know?" That, maybe, might not have been the best way to phrase that. Pepper winces, and Rhodey gets that look on his face that Tony is really only used to seeing on December 16th. “I mean, you two have already met my family, and the bot children love you both.”

That doesn’t change the looks on either of their faces, so Tony sighs and tries again. "Look, whatever you two want to do is fine by me. I don't have much shame left when it comes to my personal life, so wherever you decide your boundaries are I'll go along with it."

"Except we should also talk about what we'll do if this actually gets out to the media," Pepper adds, her voice a little softer. "Our current contingency plan is a couple of years old. I don't even think it accounts for potential backlash to the Avengers."

Tony feels his blood run a little bit cold at that. He doesn’t mind if Pepper wants to tell her family, and he could care less about the Rhodes knowing about their relationship. But the thought of dealing with the press-

It’s always been a possibility, Tony knows that. They had talked, when they first got together, about how they would handle things if word of their relationship got out. Tony is thankful that they’ve gone five years without that happening, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be safe forever. That _he’ll_ be safe forever, because if the press finds out about their relationship Tony knows it won’t be long until they find out about him being aro too.

“I think that’s a problem for after the holidays,” Rhodey says. He links one arm with Pepper, and wraps his other around Tony’s shoulder and ushers them all out of the room. “After all, we have a party to get to.”

“You had a party to get to _half an hour ago_ ,” Tony corrects, letting himself be steered towards the elevator, and letting all thoughts of the media finding out about their private lives fade away. “And as a fair warning, the team thinks you were having a quickie up here so you should probably come up with a way to deflect that.”

Rhodey refuses to let go of either of his partners, so it takes some creative shuffling for the three of them to get inside the elevator. Once they’re inside and the elevator starts descending, it’s Pepper who says, “Let them think whatever they want. If they go too far, Steve will put an end to it.”

“Or Natasha, if Pepper looks suitably pissed-off,” Rhodey adds, and Pepper hums in agreement. 

Tony shakes his head, although he’s grinning because he knows it’s true. “How did you manage to get a world-renowned assassin wrapped around your finger, anyway?” he asks her.

Pepper shrugs. “Natasha is a good friend,” she says, in lieu of giving an actual answer.

Apparently Natasha’s idea of “friendship”, though, is to be the one leading the round of applause that the trio is greeted with when they step off the elevator. It’s a testament to the fact that Pepper might as well be an Avenger herself, for how well she gets along with the team, that her response is to laugh and fake a curtsy, while Rhodey just collapses against the wall, nearly in tears from laughing so hard at the sight. 

“Alright, I think that’s enough,” Steve says, which only makes Pepper, Rhodey, and Tony laugh even harder, much to Cap’s confusion. 

It takes several minutes for everyone to settle down again, and when the group is finally seated and ready to resume the gift exchange Rhodey and Pepper are still curled around each other, having stolen the end of the couch closest to the pile of presents. Natasha has the seat next to Pepper and, despite there being room on the couch itself, Clint opts to perch on the back. Tony, from his safe place in the lone armchair in the room, notices that Natasha has one arm wrapped around his legs, and Clint has his left hand resting on her shoulder, and Tony smiles at the sight. Hopefully this is a sign that the two of them are finally healing from Clint’s revelation back in August. 

Sam and Steve have claimed the loveseat and Thor, not one to worry about the actual seats being claimed, has taken up a spot on the floor at their feet. Bruce is also on the floor, having resumed his position as Santa, and reaches for another gift. “Okay, so this one is for Jim…”

Tony relaxes back into his chair to watch the rest of the proceedings, occasionally joining in with the ribbing but otherwise content to listen to the flow of conversation and laughter around him. He wishes there was more time during the year where the entire group could hang out like this, although with their busy schedules he knows why that’s difficult. Still, he enjoys the comfortable atmosphere now, the friendly jokes, the cozy camaraderie… the _familial_ mood that’s taken over the room.

Because, privately, he knows that when he told Pepper and Rhodey that they already knew his family, he wasn’t just talking about the bots.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to be working on another long(ish) story for this series next year. Would you guys prefer it to be uploaded all at once (or new chapters every other day once it's all written), even if that means going several months without a new story, or would you want chapters posted as they're finished even if I can't promise a regular updating schedule? Leave me a comment or drop me an ask at my tumblr (willowenigma.tumblr.com) and let me know if you have a preference.


End file.
